Women
With Attention Deficit Disorder
Embracing
Disorganization at Home and in the
Workplace
by Sari Solden
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Reviews and Commentary for Women With Attention Deficit
Disorder : Embracing Disorganization at Home and in the
Workplace
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John J. Ratey, MD, co-author Driven to Distraction
:
By examining the interplay between genetics and
environment, Sari Solden has broken new ground in Women With
Attention Deficit Disorder.
Book Description :
Women with Attention Deficit Disorder addresses
the millions of withdrawn little girls and chronically overwhelmed
women with ADD who go undiagnosed because they don't fit the
stereotypical notion of people with ADD. They are not
fast-talking, hyperactive, non-attentive, and they are not male.
Though the book focuses on ADD, much of what is said also applies
to women with ADHD - Attention Deficit Hyperactivity
Disorder. Introduction by Kate Kelly and Peggy Ramundo, authors of
You Mean I'm Not Lazy, Crazy or Stupid? Foreword by John J.
Ratey, MD, co-author of Driven to Distraction.
Synopsis:
Solden, a therapist with ADD, combines the real-life
histories and treatment experiences of women with ADD with the
latest clinical research and literature to create a new screening
checklist specifically for women. She highlights the special
challenges women with ADD face, describes what to look for in
treatment and counseling, and outlines three steps for living with
ADD. Photos. Line drawings, charts.
From the Publisher :
This pioneering book explains that ADD is an
equal-opportunity disorder that affects just as many women as men.
From the Author :
Many women experience great shame when they are unable to
conform to our society's degrading "job description for women."
With exercises, self-talk and stories I help women dismantle their
self-images as "slobs" or "space cadets" and enjoy a new cycle of
success on their own.
About the Author :
Sari Solden MS, MFCC, is a psychotherapist in private
practice who specializes in individual, couple, and group work
with ADD adults and their partners. She serves as a consultant and
trains mental health profession in the diagnosis and treatment of
ADD.
Reader
Comments
A reader from Lancaster, CA USA , November 14, 1998
Easy to read and understand, excellent information.
Most books on ADD/ADHD fail to focus on its effects on
females. This book offers excellent insight and information that
is specific about how this disorder looks in women, and can be
extrapolated to young girls. The specifics offer a new ray of hope
for women afflicted with this unrecognized, but high damaging
disorder that so often goes undiagnosed until it is too late. All
teachers, medical practitioners treating the disorder, parents and
counselors should read this book. It is very informative, and
offers a whole new perspective for women.
A reader from Silicon
Valley, CA , September 26, 1998
Phonemonal Resource for Women with ADD - Enlightening!
After years of being unsuccessfully treated for
depression, I was diagnosed with ADD by a very astute
psychiatrist. This book described all of the symptoms and
frustrations I had felt for years. Instead of watching the world
pass by, I was relieved to find that other women felt just as I
did. This fantastic book offered positive methods of organizing to
minimize the confusion of ADD. It also explained the benefits of
medication which for me was a lifesaver! Today I realize ADD is
actually a gift of creativity and there are many ways to manage
the challenge and lead a rewarding, profitable life!
A reader from New York ,
August 19, 1998
Eye-opening info for newly Dx'ed hypoactive ADDers
This book will be extremely relevant to adult women - and
"hypoactive" men - who suspect they have ADD, or are newly
diagnosed. The focus is on severe difficulties with organization.
It would be extremely useful to give to friends and loved ones of
ADDers, to help them understand the illness.
A reader from
Massachusetts, USA , July 10, 1998
This book is about me...
I can not believe how much this book describes my life.
It's about time ADD with out hyperactivity is addressed. I believe
every women should read this book. I have read many books about
ADD but this one has to be the best!
Jennifer
4/12/98
I'm reading Women With Attention Deficit Disorder
by Sari Solden. It addresses ADD and the specific ways it has
an impact on girls and women, with a chapter on disorganization.
It addresses the "unwritten job description" that society places
on women to be the ones to keep track of birthdays and social
obligations, coordinate the family's household and clothing
shopping, plan all holidays, keep track of kids' schedules and
belongings, etc.
There's also an unwritten "code" in many offices that women
will do stuff like make small talk, serve on fundraising
committees, remember to send birthday and get-well cards to
coworkers, contribute food to special events, arrange going-away
lunches and showers, etc. It can be very hard for an ADD person to
be distracted from their work in these ways, and usually men
aren't expected to do all of these things in addition to their
jobs (or so says the book).
Some of you with ADD concerns might want to look up this book.
I found a copy at the public library.
mkg@voyager.net
from Traverse City, Michigan , 04/13/98, rating=10:
A lifesaver, the answers and a way out!
Sari Solden does an excellent job of summing up the total
effect of life-long ADD, that being the shame and negativity that
become internalized as a result of living with this "invisible"
disorder. Not only does it put the disorder into context that made
it able for me to begin to find my way out of the chaos, it is
helping me advocate for myself in order to believe I have the
right to the help, understanding and cooperation I need from my
husband to achieve my goals. A huge thank you, and a must read for
anyone struggling with this baffling disorder.
hypercog@connix.com
from US , 02/03/98, rating=4:
Some rare information on Women with ADD, but biased.
This book is good for women who think they may have ADD,
but only those without hyperactivity. It points out the stresses
unique to women with ADD, overlooked in other ADD books. However,
the author has a rather negative and depressive view of ADD,
unlike many women I know who thrive with the condition. Balance
this book out with something more positive by Thom Hartmann.
A Reader from Florida, U.S.A. , 10/29/97, rating=10:
This is the light at the end of the tunnel!
When I found this book I was in a panic state not knowing
how I could cope with being an A.D.D. parent of 2 A.D.D. children.
This book has information that will affirm the strengths that are
found within an A.D.D. adult and provides new insight in handling
the day to day stresses involved in parenting. As a self
proclaimed "Poster Child" for Adults with A.D.D. I must recommend
this book to every woman coping with this "adventure"!
afterlos@ix.netcom.com
, 07/24/97, rating=10:
"Women with ADD" : separating "women" and "disorder".
As a clinical social worker who also happens to be a
woman with ADD, this book was not only a practical help to me, but
a personal support as well. Of particular poignancy and importance
is Ms. Solden's advice that we "embrace our disorganization"
rather than feel repelled and ashamed of it. She talks glowingly
of attending a conference where the attendees were primarily adult
ADD folks, and the comraderie and closeness she felt with all
these people who were trying to find lost keys, fumbling for
pencils, or interrupting one another, but doing so in an
atmostphere of acceptance.
The most significant focus within Ms.Solden's book is that the
hiding (of ADD symptoms and habits) needn't continue. You can come
out of your ADD closet and find a place for yourself amongst the
"normal" folks in the world. Accurate diagnosis is essential, and
then appropriate treatment, whether it be via medication,
supportive psychotherapy or "coaching", whereby a family member,
friend or therapist helps you stay on track. Looking at ADD with
compassion and humor is something many women who are "in hiding"
with the disorder may find difficult to do. But, when the hiding
is over, so is the shame.
This book offers hope to those who may not have believed it to
be possible, yet it also avoids being saccharine or preachy. A
very balanced view of a disorder that, for many of us, causes us
to feel un-balanced.
Balance Check 4/3/98; rating = 10
This book has rightly been called a "must read" for women with ADD
(ADHD)!
Like the Teenager's
Guide to A.D.D., this book is very good reading for people
not in its intended audience - i.e. MEN. While the problems of
hormones women go through are unique to their gender, the problems
of disorganization at home and work are not!
Excerpted from
Women With Attention Deficit Disorder by Sari Solden.
Copyright(c) 1995. Reprinted by permission, all rights reserved
:
Why ADD Goes Undiagnosed Longer in Little
Girls
Even though ADHD girls are more active and therefore more
noticeable than ADD w/o girls, they too are identified and treated
later than hyperactive boys, because they don't act out as much
and cause as many problems. Another cultural stereotype that
impacts ADHD girls occurs when they don't meet the "nice little
girl" expectation. They are written off as "tomboys" instead of as
having a learning problem. Or, because they are often very social,
talkative, and emotionally reactive, they become labelled as "boy
crazy," "non academic oriented," or "party girls." Dr. Kathleen
Nadeau says that the hyperactivity of girls with ADHD is often
manifested differently than in boys. Girls are often "hyper
talkative, hyper social and hyper emotionally reactive." She also
says that the impulsive behavior of girls with ADHD is not
tolerated in the same way as boys are. They are negatively viewed
as "unladylike."
Rather than having an attentional disorder, many times their
behaviors are attributed to emotional or family problems. For
instance, in Lucy's case, if she is still undiagnosed by the time
of her parent's divorce, it will be especially difficult for her
to get an accurate diagnosis. In addition to her ADD, she will be
reacting to this upheaval in her life.
Because ADD without H girls aren't behavior problems, they
often aren't identified at a young age, unless they also happen to
have obvious learning disabilities. Another reason they don't get
diagnosed, according to Dr. Daniel Amen, is that the cultural
stereotypes that we have of little girls contribute to an under
identification. As in Jodi's case, the school system tolerates
underachievement in girls that it wouldn't in boys. Also, I feel
that ADD without girls usually fall into the "nice little girl"
stereotype. Because they are quiet and nice, and often trying to
please, they are actually meeting cultural expectations, and
people either don't notice or are not as concerned with their
subtle information processing problems.
Another way ADD is often detected is during an evaluation for
learning disabilities. Because girls with ADD have fewer learning
problems in the early grades in math and reading than boys do,
according to Drs. Hallowell and Ratey, in Answers to
Distraction, these girls are less apt to be diagnosed through
this avenue.
The reason early identification of girls is so important is
that years of being mis labelled, mis understood or just plain
missed, leads to serious long term consequences to their self
esteem, relationships, achievement and emotions.
Table of
Contents
-
- A Note to the Reader
- Foreword
- By John Ratey
- Introduction
- By Kate Kelly, Peggy Ramundo
- Author's Preface
- A Pocket Guide to ADD
- Essay: The Buried Treasure
- Ch. 1. Coming out of the (Messy) Closet: Introduction to My
Personal and Professional Story
- Ch. 2. Girls and ADD: An Equal Opportunity Disorder
- Ch. 3. "Dance with the Lady with the Hole in Her Stocking":
A Portrait of the Inner World of Women with ADD Before
Diagnosis
- Ch. 4. "Who am I? What's the Matter with Me?"
- Ch. 5. Disorganization: The Disorder of Dis-order
- Ch. 6. The Job from Hell: A Woman's Job Description
- Ch. 7. The Emotional Legacy
- Ch. 8. Secondary Effects: Underachievement and a Depressed
Mood
- Ch. 9. Secondary Effects: Relationships
- Ch. 10. Diagnostic Dilemmas For Women
- Ch. 11. Self-Assessment for Women and Paths to
Diagnosis
- Ch. 12. An Overview of Treatment: Getting Started The Grief
Cycle, Medication, Women's Issues
- Ch. 13. Treatment Continued: The Rest of the MESST:
Education, Support, Strategies and Therapy
- Essay: Diamonds in the Rough
- Ch. 14. Embracing Disorganization
- Ch. 15. The 3 R's at Work: Restructuring, Renegotiating,
Redefining
- Ch. 16. Restructuring: at Home and in Your Personal
Life
- Ch. 17. Renegotiating Your Relationships
- Ch. 18. Redefining your Self-Image
- About the Author
- Acknowledgements
- Resources
- Bibliography
- Index
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